Father's Day, June 18 2017
I have a father, a dad and he died 19 years ago on my birthday. You'd think I'd be devastated but I'm not. He was a difficult man. Some days he'd give us the world but most days he was angry. I now know that he could have been helped with medication and counseling. He wasn't helped, so we suffered. We all have memories buried deep. We are all still wounded. Each of us have different triggers. Years ago I forgave him. My burden was lifted. I felt peace for the first time in 20 years. Sometimes I forget that I forgave him. For instance, when I hear the suffering of my siblings. But then I remember and I feel that peace. I will always be too aware of all I see around me. Hoping that there are no secrets behind closed doors. But I will also be faithfully aware of repentance and change and hope and peace.